"For months after, I was left with the sense of being a caged lion. Roaming back and forth in a very small cage. Restless. In a sense the lion was an energy, or a state of consciousness within me, one I was not familiar with. This lion would roar, and wanted to be set free. And even though my soul was uncaged, I was still contained in a space that was way too small. I hadn't reached the infinite eternal. Something had been set free, but something so much deeper was becoming available. The lion had to be released because I was going to need the energy of that lion; I was going to need that state of consciousness in order to make the next step of the journey. You could say, also, that this lion represented a courage within me. I needed the courage to trust what I knew to be true; I needed that courage in order to continue on."
- Lynn Barron, as quoted by Hilary Hart, "Pulled by Love," The Unknown She
The time to take the next step in transition comes when you have spiritually outgrown your last step, when the lioness inside feels tightly caged and is roaring to be let out, sinews ready to tear apart the cage that keeps her hunched inside, when she knows she more than strong enough to fend for herself.
It is a move toward comfort that pulls us, and we can become raging beasts if we do not get at least a bigger cage. The bars hurt, and where were once able to live our lot, we feel our freedom strangled.
The cage was not meant to hurt us. In fact, it was constructed to keep us safe until we grew, whether someone else built it for us, or we constructed it on our own.
This seems to be the very metaphor I seem to have instinctively followed. Inside my final cage, my spirit bursting to get out, I only wait for my key, the result of a conference call and the resulting direction, and I'll be free!
Dancing was great last night! I got a personal invite to a Derby party at Jim's house, one of many people attending, and I danced for an hour after the lessons were over. I am going to miss lessons next week. The club is having another event that will preclude the lesson.
Tomorrow, my support group is meeting at my hangout. They will gather around the table in billiard room, and I'll stroll over to say "Hi," but I'll also have to go hang out with my other friends who are regulars.
Tonight, I'll just spend at home and see if I can finally finish The Unknown She.
Hugs and God Bless,