Saturday, January 4, 2014

Two Transgender Women Marry in Utah

Yup, that's us in the article holding our marriage certificate, the third article that I've written and certainly the one closest to my heart. I have a strong feeling that Danilynn and I are the first same-sex transgender couple to be legally married in Utah since Utah banned same-sex marriages in 2004. We had a wedding ceremony in late October, and when Judge Robert Shelby struck down Amendment 3 to the Utah State Constitution, a flurry of 900 couples and quite a few of my friends became legally wed that day, including a couple in Moab.

Danilynn was in town, but exhausted and sleeping in her cab after her night shift as an over-the-road truck driver. She was on a fast turn-around, and it wasn't until she was back on the road that evening that we discussed tying the knot legally for the final time. We held our bated breaths while we watched the attorney general try to get a stay on the weddings, waiting for her to be re-routed to Salt Lake City. She arrived early Saturday morning on the 28th at just after midnight, and we were married at the Salt Lake County Government Center on December 30th by 10:30 am. Outside, in our wedding dresses, passers-by honked and cheered while we exchanged our vows. Everywhere on the application I saw the word groom, I struck it out and replaced it with bride. We're still awaiting the certified copies of our license in the mail.

Before my wife left for the road on Wednesday, we consummated our marriage trucker style in the back of her cab. Eight hours of sure bliss, as her co-driver picked up the empty trailer, cleaned it out, and drove it to the dock where it was loaded up with yogurt. My wife walked me back to my car parked at the yards where we could give our goodbyes and I drove home. We call each other twice a day, and she doesn't know when she'll be back home; it's up to the dispatchers. Last I heard, they had dropped their load in Ohio and were headed back to California. Her birthday's coming up tomorrow, and we will have to delay the celebration for when she finally returns, whenever that is.

The article was published on Thursday evening and so far has 268 likes, 6 tweets, and 6 shares. The Lone Star Q, an online publication that is less than two months old, is not registered as a major news outlet, which means the national media probably hasn't seen this story. That's why I am asking everyone to help this go viral. I am hoping that by putting our story out there, it will help shift attitudes. We could have done this is stealth, but we deliberately chose not to.

The following is an excerpt from the article. If you like it, please share it in as many places as you can.

Hugs and Blessings,
Sofia Featherwind

Two Transgender Women Marry in Utah
by Sophia Jean Hawes Lutrova, aka Sofia Featherwind

We’re legally married in Utah. In Utah!

We’re two transgender women who never saw the day coming when we would be able to do this. We’re going to file our income taxes jointly this year and change our names. I will become Mrs. Sophia Jean Hawes Lutrova, and she will become Mrs. Danilynn Louise (Tingey) Lutrova.

Danilynn feels strongly about the need for marriage equality in Utah because it affects transgender people as well.

A military child, I moved to North Texas when I was 12. With the exception of four years in the Navy in San Diego, I spent the next 33 years in the Fort Worth area, trying to stay true to my Baptist upbringing. I married, had two children, and then began my transition while I was there. Eventually, painfully, I had to leave Texas for employment in first Kentucky and then Utah, leaving my wife and children behind. Our marriage of 13 years was not strong enough to survive all the change and stress.



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  2. The Lone Star Q is no longer serving up the story. It can be found in the Way Back Cache: